The period immediately after the wedding is often filled with couples expressing fondness towards each other. Most newly-weds take time off on holiday to relax and begin building the bond their relationship requires to thrive. Though the short holiday is often regarded as honeymoon; the period of honeymoon for a newly-wed actually exceeds those few days of exclusive holiday. It includes up to over a month after the wedding, when they are full of passion for each other, always wanting to be around each other, enjoying passionate sex and freedom. This is the period that climaxes all the attraction they felt for each other during courtship.
However shortly
after this period, the passion appears to wane; the spark appears to have gone
off. In some cases, couples begin finding faults with each other’s actions.
Some couples begin to spot what they term irreconcilable differences.
Interestingly, some of the things couples complain about each other at such
times are the very reasons they chose to marry each other. Some of these issues
may have been noticed but were overlooked or downplayed during courtship. How
come they were overlooked then and are now issues to whine about? This article
considers some of the reasons the changes happen.
Closeness Increases Vulnerability: Before the wedding, couples saw each other from a
distance, so they could intentionally or unintentionally hide certain aspects
of their behaviour. As they begin living together, they are bound to be themselves
and open up certain things that the other person may not really cherish.
Awareness Increases Familiarity: The more aware couples are of each other’s behaviours and attitude, the more familiar they become towards each other. With this level of familiarity, it would appear they are taking each other for granted. The newness of the relationship is gone; it appears that there is nothing to be excited about.
Someone Has Moved On: This is usually said about men. It is believed that men are hunters and
handle issues as projects. When one project ends, they move on to other things.
When as a hunter they capture a game, they shift attention to other issues.
Reality Has Set In: Dating and Courtship is different from marriage. The responsibilities
that come with marriage are more than what obtains in dating and courtship.
There is higher level of commitment and these present new realities to a
married couple.
The Chemistry Tends to Disappear: Chemistry is the force of attraction that comes with
meeting and developing close relationship. It is often described as someone
feeling butterflies in their body especially whenever they were with the other
person. It helps to heighten the desire for intimacy with someone and
facilitates sexual relationship. During the period after honeymoon, it appears
to have disappeared in the face of fresh realities.
I believe that this edition has been a blessing to someone. Your
comments are appreciated.
Talks
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